Thursday, September 23, 2010

An Open Letter to Kapil Sibal — Union Minister for Human Resource Degradation


Dear Mr. Kapil “I-shall-destroy-IITs” Sibal,

I have many questions going through my mind. But let’s start with this one, what exactly are the functions that fall under the regime of HRD (Human Resource Department — is it, still??). Is it just education? And in that too, just IITs? Or do you presume that in India, education means just the IITs? If not, please explain this obsession of your ministry with the IITs, tenure after tenure. First it was, what’s-his-name… Arjun Singh... and now you. Just because our PM is a man of"integrity and honesty" (which, somehow implies he shouldn't speak, come what may!!), doesn’t mean you should take advantage.

A thoughtful mind
Now, what’s with this mentality of “not trying to improve things that don't work, rather solving all your problems using theonly things that work.” The one working thing in your case are the IITs — and you tamper with only them to do each and everything, be it inclusive socialupliftment (reservations), lack of good doctors in India (medicine at IITs), education to the politicians' children with double-digit IQ levels (Show as much maturity as your white hair suggests, Mr Sibal — and you'll find how easy it is for such people to get a fake board certificate with whatever–marks–on–demand, despite the fact that they would never in their wildest dreams, even in the fourth level of Nolan’s Inception, be able to ace JEE exam), reducing the stress level in 12th (Stress levels? If you can’t take the board exam stress, don’t get into IITs in the first place — simple! Now, if you think the nation can function without someone taking the stress, aha! — we sure are looking at a superpower nation soon). 


I am sure soon you must be having plans to solve pollution, poverty, population and corruption problems and your IQ problems as well through IITs.

If the engineering + medical coachings 
were not enough, now let's have 
engineering + medical institutes of 
"technology"
Now coming back to the point, you talk about including the 12th class scores for IIT entrance. In case you don’t know, here is a news flash for you, India has around 25 state boards, plus the CBSE and ICSE. For a Tamil Nadu student, the highest marks can be 99.8%, while in Uttar Pradesh, it hardly touches 90%. Also, CBSE is a high-scoring board. I wish you all the best in your attempt to normalise these — to bring them at par. I suggest you give the task to the folks who conducted the online CAT last year. They are well-equipped and experienced in dealing with the guilt of messing with lakhs of aspirants anyway.

Also you have suggested introducing medical education into the IITs. I wonder if it is your way of bringing all colleges at par. Good one though, it’s always easier and cheaper to degrade the level of a couple of IITs (jugaad, we call it), than to raise that of a gazillion things with crumbling buildings, barely graduate faculties and with lavatories with a single microscope functioning as laboratories. Or, maybe out of pity on the IIT students, to give them some action by the on-campus presence of female medical students. In that case, a big THANK YOU on behalf of all my juniors. They eagerly await the arrival of medical batch. Some worried souls in the final year who might be passing out in 2011 are seriously considering getting a degree extension in case you postpone the implementation to 2012. Please don’t postpone it to after 2012 — Daruwalla tells me the world is gonna end in 2012 anyway — your education ministry hasn't taught us not to believe him.

Whatever the reason, if we needed someone just to tell us superficial ideas read off from American university brochures, we could have made any Tom, Dick and Harry or Shivraj Patil our HRD Minister. Why did we pick a Harvard graduate? And how credible does your degree sound if you can’t understand that whatever works in US might not work in India in that exact same format.

I haven’t seen you in any corruption charges either. I wonder why you're still stuck around in politics?! With that Harvard Law degree, you could be making good money out there. At the worst, you would be letting some criminals escape; at the least you would not be screwing an entireupcoming generation of India. I read somewhere that you cleared the IAS exam and didn’t join later, I admired your guts back then — but now I so wish you had joined, you could have been an ambassador to some country like Nepal (is it a state of India already or still independent country?) or Afghanistan or some babu looking after the CWG games etc, at least sparing India’s future from your wrath.


This man's maid will teach you
how to pull off cleverer publicity stunts
They say Youth Power is India’s greatest power. I say — let Kapil Sibal be done and we’ll talk. If publicity is the only reason you are doing all this, I would be ashamed of your dumbness and say Rakhi Sawant and Shiney Ahuja’s maid have better publicity strategies. Go intoBigg Boss for God's sake! They are casting mentally imbalanced people anyway and I am sure that if Vindu Dara Singh and Rahul Mahajan can get in, you sure will. People will vote for anything, didn’t we elect you already?

As much as I would hate to burst your bubble and be responsible for another psychiatrist losing a potential client, let me tell you, that a brand name (IITs or something else) is not the entire story. Good students and the faculty make an institution what it is. Now with your weird policy for IIT entrance, weirder for faculty recruitmentadd to the reservation, the standard is bound to get low. Are you aware that more than 80% of the students who get terminated from or get academic backlogs in IITs are from the reserved lot? Oh, you have an innovative solution for that as well, relax the passing criterion for them and give them degrees somehow; after all we have been oppressing them for ages. Let me again introduce you to the reality, companies coming for the recruitment are NOT dumb either. They will start asking for category in recruitment, even if you pump up their GPAs by relaxation criterion and bam!! You have jobless IITians! Now in the market and your beloved foreign countries where you and Anu Malik get most of your innovative, original ideas from, will not see this as the ‘reserved’ lot, and all this will only degrade the brand name my senior IIT alumni have worked so hard to build.
Awaiting the "Common Sense for All" Bill.
Talking of you, Mr Sibal.

Ever heard of primary education, and children in rural areas not even having access to it? Passing a Right to Education (RTE) bill and giving a press conference about it can keep you in the media for a week but to actually make some change you have to implement it. Mid-day meals website is selling Viagra under your noses. I am not sure if mid-day meal fall under your domain. No, maybe not; after all, mid-day meals are not an IIT activity. You are just busy looking into which coaching the JEE topper was enrolled with.

By the way, are you also suffering from a short term memory loss? Weren’t you this guy who said in an interview to Karan Thapar, “IITs are precious; I will not interfere with them”? Or are we both using different dictionaries to look up the meaning of ‘interfere’ and 'precious'?

If you ask me, A. Raja, Madhu Koda and Suresh Kalmadi are much better than you. They are just taking away India’s money, not its future. You should be ashamed of yourself after reading the next line, but IIPM students have better sense of right or wrong than you do. And yes, I am saying this despite being fully aware that they are the ones who take admission in IIPM even after reading all the false claims.

I have many more things to say to you, but am keeping it short, considering you might be very busy going though the list of students who qualified JEE to take admission in the 15 (or 16, 17, or 20, or whatever number you increased it to since I started writing this article till I publish it) IITs. Checking which rank holder got which IIT and what department, thinking about launching a CBI enquiry into it. Do that! Because the (self-proclaimed) emerging superpower India needs its best crime investigation agency (CBI) and HRD ministry to do nothing better today. While we are at it, I got a B in a course in my 3rd semester, could you ask CBI to look into it, please… pretty please!!

— A voice straight from the heart of an IIT Alumnus


Comments (152)

awesome post dude!!!....very well articulated....echoed my views...hats off 2 u man!
Ajit· 1 week ago
haha..hillarious (Viagra sold on MDM site ooo!).. and seems some of our china town discussions pooped out!  . He has certainly gone wrong with managing IITs esp. entramce exams. but rest of your criticisms were only from heart, as you rightly pointed out at the end :P and unfair to Sibal.   
Ravi· 1 week ago
Somebody make sue that Mr. Kapil read this.
1 reply · active 12 hours ago
seema· 1 week ago
gud job sonny! (am d mother of an IIT aspirant 4 2011 nd he sent me d link) found it a l'l too sarcastic, bt i gs its OK. i know u ppl wd write abt IITs or related stuff bt try writing abt CCE introduced by ur Mr. Sibal again last year in CBSE schools(actually am a tchr too, i tch senior classes in a public school, dts why ds concern).
1 reply · active less than 1 minute ago
Bijender Sheoran· 1 week ago
@ Sanchit: thanx man 
Bijender Sheoran· 1 week ago
@Ajit: hehe....thanx for taking some time out to read it, I know u wud be hell busy.....ya the China Town discussions were class man!....btw all the best 
Bijender Sheoran· 1 week ago
@Ravi; hehe....thanx 
Bijender Sheoran· 1 week ago
@Seema: thanx ma'am for liking it....we try to address all idiosyncrasies of our leaders that affect people in general by sarcasm, satire and humour ...sure will try to write about CCE as well
Rohit Behl· 1 week ago
shit man!!...u r an IITian :O ....never knew after reading that Facebook Apps article.....u write too good for an IITian! :P
1 reply · active 1 week ago
This comment has been deleted by the administrator.
1 reply · active 4 days ago
Excellent post! 
1 reply · active less than 1 minute ago
Ravius· 1 week ago
Took you very long to come up with it!! 
http://soliloquiesomine.blogspot.com/2009/10/lost-sibbal_24.html
1 reply · active less than 1 minute ago
Great Post!!! 

Light to Education should come before Right to Education.
1 reply · active less than 1 minute ago
abhishek golhani· 1 week ago
hats off to u man.......
1 reply · active 1 week ago
Santhosh· 1 week ago
Real feelings of those students who dream to get into IIT's after a lot hard work and not getting it because of some stupids nature of judging people with and without reservations... These people's nature seems that only people with reservations are citizens of India and others not.. Guys we too are indians and after all we're not aliens..
1 reply · active 1 week ago
Mukul· 5 days ago
great article ..I agree pretty harshly on the reservation in admissions ...  

well about the jobs for them ... there are a lot of PSU coming to iit's for recruitments and they have almost 1:2 seat for STSC's ... they eventually get placed .. if not .. they pursue IAS ...  

I am happy that i passed out just an year before the new iits rolled out... 
2 replies · active less than 1 minute ago
Shashank· 5 days ago
salutations 
1 reply · active 5 days ago
rxg· 5 days ago
15 years since d start of d insti...n ppl still think iitg is running n kgp......for ur kind info iitg is nurturing iitp..n has one of d best campus in india.....n yeah...every student gets a single room in itg...its not crammed up like kgp or mumbai for d matter... 
being a delite i knw dat hostel acomodation was not provided to students who vr from delhi itself initially....mrover 3 students r crammed i 1 room dere....iitg is a much btr place when it comes to infrastructure... 
while kanpurs audi n lec theatres are leaking.....we have new beatiful LTs n Audis with 2000+ capacity.....with projectors, mikes n aditional power back ups in each n every clas rom...our academic building is 1 km long to say d least..
1 reply · active less than 1 minute ago
Pragya· 5 days ago
wow... that was a great article.... way 2 go!! he has brought a lot of crap in the indian education system... as if we didn't have enough to deal with before!!  
1 reply · active 5 days ago
ajay· 5 days ago
hope that man sibal can build some IQ by readin it..or at worst ask 4 a CBI enqyiry bout this post as well... 
R.I.P. sibal...
1 reply · active less than 1 minute ago
erwin· 5 days ago
i am a third year IIT student.... 
how can we make sure that kapil sibal reads this???
3 replies · active 3 days ago
J.jain· 5 days ago
sir its really great to have i as a citizen of my country.....
1 reply · active less than 1 minute ago
Pranjal· 5 days ago
But I think Kapil sibal has done a lot of life saving work after his predecessor , Arjun Singh . It takes guts in cancelling the deemed university status of 44 institutions in India ... which was the first thing he did ...Also , IIT as a brand have diluted due to the Government's counter anti-reservation measures ... which included increasing number of IITs , which harmed it more ... At any day , Kapil Sibal is giving high publicity space to IITs which are helping it anyway .... Though this article may give very skewed view to Non IITians reading this ... about IITs , but those who attend IITs know that its not that big gr8 thing ... , and if anything helps is the brand name which alumni are creating in silicon valley .... 
One of biggest hurdles for IITs to come in top university lists is that it is limited to few departments and about medical department at IIT .... Since MIT has one , so , IIT must have one ... thats it .... 
And about publicity stunts , they are necessary components of architecture of soft power ... Such news have potential of increased investments in India ... given the fact the top schools outside are considering to build campuses in India ... which sent shockwaves to IITs , because of  their unpreparedness for it ..., Kapil Sibal medical and centre for policy studies .. was necessary to prepare IITs before the next HRD minister after Sibal opens indian education sector for foreign players which Indian Institutes are presently afraid of .... 

1 comment:

  1. this is really very nice post and i am really very impressed with your instinct of writing

    ReplyDelete